This is a little random . . . but hopefully interesting! I've been thinking lately about marriage/civil unions and how they fit with my beliefs. I just had a look at the Births, Deaths and Marriages website (Dept. of Internal Affairs) www.bdm.govt.nz and found the following information about organisations that are exempt from the standard requirements around marriage/civil unions. My understanding (please correct me if I'm wrong) is that Quakers are one of these groups. I'm not entirely sure what form the Quaker exemption takes, so if anybody knows please could they post it here?! The basic tone of my wonderings is this:

1. Do I feel a standard marriage/civil union would fit comfortably with my beliefs?

2. If not, would a Quaker wedding/civil union?

3. If not, is anybody else in the same boat, and should we start up a new 'body' and apply for a new exemption so that we could have important and legally recognised ceremonies of this sort that are consistent with our beliefs/values?

My current feeling is that I don't quite like standard marriage/CU requirements because you have to say who you're being married "by". If I get married I intend to marry myself, lol, not be acted upon by some random third party. Even if that 3rd party was Quakers, I'm not sure I'm entirely comfortable with that. I've been reading again about medieval marriage and it appeals to me that, historically, any two people could marry each other by simply making a statement to that effect. I know this will seem really petty to some people, but it really grates on me that I can't just do that! When did the other rules sneak in?

Anyway, looking forward to hearing your wise words, and here's the bit about exempt bodies from the Civil Union Act 2004 (available on line from: http://www.legislation.govt.nz/browse_vw.asp?content-set=pal_statutes&clientid=157055&viewtype=contents)

Civil Union Act 2004

Section 1.

EXEMPT BODIES

1.Application to become exempt body—

(1)A body that wishes to become an exempt body must apply to the Registrar-General for exemption in the prescribed form.

(2)The application must set out—

(a)the name and contact address of the body; and

(b)the objects and beliefs of the body; and

(c)the approximate number of its members who are of or over the age of 16; and

(d)an explanation of why the objects and beliefs of the body are inconsistent with the requirements of this Act for the solemnisation of a civil union; and

(e)the rules and procedures that the body proposes to apply when solemnising a civil union.

(3)The application must be signed by at least 10 members of the body who are of or over the age of 16, each of whom must give their age and address, and the signatures must be accompanied by a statutory declaration, signed by a person who is not a member, to the effect that the signatories are who they claim to be and are members of the body.

2.Registrar-General or Minister may grant exemption—

(1)The Registrar-General may agree to grant the exemption applied for if any prescribed application fee is paid and the Registrar-General is satisfied that—

(a)the objects and beliefs of the body are inconsistent with the requirements of this Act for the solemnisation of a civil union; and

(b)the rules and procedures that the body proposes to apply when solemnising a civil union are generally consistent with this Act and are otherwise satisfactory.

(2)If the Registrar-General fails or refuses to agree to exempt the body, he or she must refer the matter to the Minister.

(3)The Minister must agree to grant the exemption sought if he or she is satisfied as to the matters referred to in subclause (1), but, if the Minister is not so satisfied, he or she must refuse the application.

(4)The Registrar-General must advise the applicant of the result of the application.

(5)When the Registrar-General or the Minister agrees to exempt a body from the requirements of this Act for the solemnisation of a civil union, the Registrar-General must give notice in the Gazette of that fact, and the body is exempt from the date specified in the notice.

3.Exempt body to notify changes—

(1)An exempt body must notify the Registrar-General if—

(a)it changes its name; or

(b)it changes its objects and beliefs in a way that impacts on why it considers that the requirements of this Act for the solemnisation of a civil union are inconsistent with those objects and beliefs; or

(c)it changes its rules and procedures for solemnising civil unions.

(2)If the body notifies the Registrar-General that it has changed its name, the Registrar-General must give notice of that fact in the Gazette.

(3)The Registrar-General must ask the Minister to cancel the exemption of an exempt body if the Registrar-General is satisfied that,—

(a)as a result of changes referred to in subclause (1)(b) or (c), the body should no longer be an exempt body; or (b)the body has failed to conduct one or more civil unions in accordance with its rules and procedures as most recently notified to the Registrar-General.

(4)If the Minister decides that the body should no longer be an exempt body, the Registrar-General must give notice in the Gazette that the body is no longer an exempt body, and notify the body accordingly.

(5)A body ceases to be an exempt body on the date on which the notice referred to in subclause (4) is published in the Gazette.

16.Solemnisation by exempt body—

(1)A civil union may be solemnised by an exempt body if it is solemnised in accordance with the rules and procedures of the body as most recently notified to the Registrar-General in accordance with Schedule 1.

(2)When a civil union is solemnised by an exempt body, the obligations imposed on civil union celebrants by section 62B of the Births, Deaths, and Marriages Registration Act 1995 must be performed by the person or office holder, or in the manner, as set out in the rules and procedures of the exempt body that have been most recently notified to the Registrar-General in accordance with Schedule 1.